July 8, 2025
Fewer Days That Suck: The Mindset Shift You Need Now
What if you could wake up tomorrow with fewer days that suck—and more that truly shine? Join Divya Parekh for a lively, energizing conversation with Deborah Mallow, Positive Energy and Mindset Expert and author of 6 Steps To Fewer Days That Suck....
What if you could wake up tomorrow with fewer days that suck—and more that truly shine?
Join Divya Parekh for a lively, energizing conversation with Deborah Mallow, Positive Energy and Mindset Expert and author of 6 Steps To Fewer Days That Suck. Known as a true ray of sunshine, Deborah shares her practical, no-nonsense steps to transform your mindset, reset your energy, and approach life with renewed enthusiasm—even on the hardest days.
Beyond Confidence is broadcast live Tuesdays at 10AM ET on W4WN Radio - Women 4 Women Network (www.w4wn.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com). Beyond Confidence TV Show is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com).
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WEBVTT
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The topics and opinions expressed on the following show are
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solely those of the hosts and their guests, and not
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those of W four WN Radio It's employees or affiliates.
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We make no recommendations or endorsement for radio show programs, services,
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or products mentioned on air or on our web. No liability,
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Radio It's employees or affiliates. Any questions or common should
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be directed to those show hosts. Thank you for choosing
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W four WN Radio.
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This is Beyond Confidence with your host d W. Park.
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Do you want to live a more fulfilling life? Do
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you want to live your legacy and achieve your personal, professional,
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and financial goals? Well? Coming up on ZVO Parks Beyond Confidence,
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you will hear real stories of leaders, entrepreneurs, and achievers
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who have steps into discomfort, shattered their status quo, and
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are living the life they want. You will learn how
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relationships are the key to achieving your aspirations and financial goals.
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Moving your career business forward does not have to happen
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at the expense of your personal or family life or
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vice versa. Learn more at WWWA. You don't divpork dot
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com and you can connect with div ants contact dantsdvpark
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dot com. This is beyond confidence and now here's your
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host TV Park.
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Good morning listeners. It's Tuesday morning, and I'm so thrilled
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to be here with you all. So I have a
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beautiful kind of story for you. So in our neighborhood,
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we have two beautiful ladies expecting and so they are
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you know, in the heat. It is like really really
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hot and all of that. So as I was saying, like,
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you know, one of the ladies was walking down the
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street and she seemed, you know, it's very uncomfortable and
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just kind of waiting, and then one neighbor just brought out,
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like you know, a glass of water, so a little bit,
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and it was just fascinating to see, like, you know,
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one little act can go such a long ways, and
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the smile broke. And as the smile broke, the beauty
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of that was that human connection goes such a long ways.
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So basically that's our story for the kind of story
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for this week. And another thing I want to share
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with you is that if you have got our books,
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think you think you thank you for supporting us. And
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also I'm excited to share. My next book is in works.
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There are there have been some tears and some tears
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sometimes of joy. But you know, every book that you
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write is like just having a different baby. So just
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excited to share. I'm writing a book on artificial intelligence
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and hoping to finish it off in the next few months.
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I'll keep you posted. So for those of you who
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have got a boox, please know that you know we're
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very thankful. And for those of you have don't got
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a boox, do get the books and help us help
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this spread the kindness. Let's bring in our guest, Hi.
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Deborah, Hello, good morning, Hello everybody. Thank you for having
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me with join you, Daviyah. It's an honor.
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Oh, it's wonderful to have you on the show. So Deborah,
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share with us. Do you recall a moment or a
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person who infused you with sunshine?
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Oh, there's so many people along the way that have
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done that. But I think making a tribute to my mom,
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who's ninety one years old, one years young, would be
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the sunshine in my life.
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She's such a support and so.
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Proud of me always that it just fills my heart
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with joy.
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And how did she created that? Impact on you.
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Interestingly enough, back in the day when it wasn't as
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common as it is today for women to start a business.
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At twenty six years old, she started a business. She's
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a fashion designer. Was that was her career, and so
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was my dad. I grew up in a creative home
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and she was determined to make this work. My dad
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was working for a big company, he was a head designer,
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and she said, if I make this work, when your
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contract's up, you'll come join me and we'll do it together.
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And they did. And that's why when you ask about sunshine,
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to me, that's what sunshine is about is finding your purpose,
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your passion, lifting other people up, believing in yourself, that confidence.
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That's what I love you. The name of your show,
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Davia Live Beyond Confidence. It's all about that, developing resilience.
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Life is messy, it will never be perfect. But we
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owe it to ourselves to say yes to our lives.
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And my parents said yes to.
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Their lives, and it's in me to say yes now too.
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And doing that for your children, for your friends, lifting
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them up, for all of us is so important. Making
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time to give yourself a hug and honor yourself, and
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what you want out of life. We can make it
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happen if we put effort into this.
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Hmmm, love that say yes to life?
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Yes.
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Now, society has different definitions of success. So and then
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you know, as a child grows up, parents are teaching
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the child something. Then teachers and friends and what they
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observe and the heroes and movies, and you know, there's
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such a different layer upon layer that is being developed
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for this child and they develop their lens through that.
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So how can they find what is there?
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Yes?
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What are they going to say yes to?
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And you know, it's really.
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Different for each of us because everybody defines success in
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different ways.
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I define success.
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As waking up in the morning and finding my happy's. Yes,
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that's stress, the cortisol spike that happens naturally. We have
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to work against that, and that to me is success.
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Just enjoying my life and going after the dreams and
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the goals that I cherish the most. That's in my heart,
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and I always encourage people for their children is most
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importantly confidence, giving them the confidence to believe in themselves,
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to make mistakes. It's okay, I don't like the word failure.
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I call it I've renamed it education and growth and
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letting your children know that falling down is the way
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you're going to achieve what it is in your heart,
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and building them up and helping them along, not enabling them,
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not doing it for them, but letting them find themselves,
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who they are, find their sunshine.
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I think that's so important to via.
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You're absolutely right. So, Deborah, you have two great role
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models where they you know your parents said yes to life.
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So my question too is what did you say yes
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to life? And tell us a little bit more about
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your life journey.
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Okay, sure we'll do, because I think it's a lesson
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in not letting yourself shrink, disappear, get caught up in
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the nonsense. There's so many things we can get caught
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up in, the worry, the fear, the negativity. And the
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reason I say this is that, for a while striving
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to be a number one sales rep, I've always wanted
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to be at my best, not compete with other people,
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but do my best. And with that I sometimes lost myself.
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I lost the joy in life because I was always
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chasing my tail, so to speak, that hamster wheel. So
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there I was standing on a New York City subway platform.
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I was very emotional because I was on this hamster wheel,
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striving to be number one, negativity, the excuses, all the things,
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and not enjoying my life.
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And it hit me. And it's such a simple thing
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you say.
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People would say, well, there's nothing to that, but honestly,
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I said to myself, nothing will change unless I change.
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And I urge everybody to find your balance, not overwhelm
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yourself and have to do everything all at once, but
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slowly small steps lead to big changes over time. So
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I took the time to find more balance in my
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life so that I could say yes not just to
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accomplishments and to career success, but say yes to living
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my life, enjoying, traveling, meeting new people, spending time, having
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an enjoyable dinner with a friend. And there's so much
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more to life and to ourselves and being just a
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well rounded person, exercising, sleeping well, eating healthily, all the
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things that make us feel better, because when we feel better,
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the saying goes, you do better. So I have come back,
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I have found my luster again, my sparkle, and I
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help other people do that, but I also encourage people
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to take a step back, to pause, to give yourself
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the grace to welcome your true self and enjoy life
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more because we are the ones that can do that
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for ourselves. And it's easy to say that that's trite
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and to put it off and to get caught up
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in the negativity. But as I say, negativity and positivity
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are contagious. Each are contagious. It's our choice to pick
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which when we want to embrace, and I choose positive
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energy and spreading it around and lifting other people up
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and enjoying the moment, saying yes to being present in
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the moment, talking with you. It's just a joy. You
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feel it in your heart. It just makes you feel
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so much better.
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M Yeah, definitely. So did you go back to the
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sales job? What did you do? Because a lot of
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fun listeners are listening and saying like, yeah, you know, Deborah,
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what you're saying makes sense, but you want to know, like,
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you know, how did you apply to your real life?
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And you know, for everybody, I understand, you can't necessarily
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just leave a job, and I didn't. I worked on
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changing making adjustments, but eventually I did because I had
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a bigger purpose that I felt I needed to. When
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I was able to do that, I worked on it
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and every But what we do is we have choices.
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You hear about side hustles and making time. There's always
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time if you can't leave a job because it provides
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for yourself, for your family. Honestly, don't suort change yourself.
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Find the time. I get up super early, find the
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time in the day to start making a plan to
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work on it, because honestly, who.
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Is it for, It's for you.
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So what I did is I started writing what was
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my guidebook, all the things I needed to do to
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get back to, to bring my sparkle back, to say
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yes to a bigger life, a bigger version of myself.
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And I started to write down commitments, quotes, questions I
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needed to ask myself. I did a lot of research
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the science behind why we act a certain way and tips,
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action items, mantras, all that stuff. It turned, as you know,
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into my books six Steps to Fewer that suck. But
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I started that initially for myself, and everybody can find
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the time if they choose to. Everything is a choice,
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and we have the choice to spend our time the
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way we choose our downtime, so to speak. And yes,
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we have commitments, we have families, we have jobs, we
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have everything, but if it's important enough to you, you
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will make the time because rather than fretting about it, procrastinating, worrying, thinking,
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just sit down and do it. Because, like anything, the
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more we do something, it's a positive habit that I'm suggesting.
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And the more you do it, because our brains love patterns,
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the more it becomes a pattern, the more you're prone.
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To do it.
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And that's the way to get started. Small steps lead
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to big changes over time. So the wonderful part about
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doing that, Divvy and I think you'll agree, is when
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we start to see those accomplishments. Put a note up
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on your fridge, on a mirror, I give yourself a
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goal star. Celebrate yourself. Celebrate these moments that gives you
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the courage to keep going. See what you can accomplish
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even in the downtime, the times early in the morning
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or late at night, or whenever you can find time
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to work on your goals, on your dreams. And then
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maybe one day you'll be able to leave that job,
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or maybe not, but.
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Still you'll have this that's part of you to look
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forward to.
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And that's what I did, and now I'm proud to
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say I do this full time and it's joy. But
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again it's a choice, and it takes discipline and it
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takes effort, and that's what we need to do in
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order to accomplish our goals and to feel good about ourselves.
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Yeah, definitely. So tell us you talk about decluttering the
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toxic thoughts? How can people you go about that?
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Say that one more time, Diviya.
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Yeah, so a lot of people experience toxic thoughts. Oh
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you can undo this, You cannot doing this choice in
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a critic whatever you want to call it. How can
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people get rid of those?
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And again I call that flipping the script because we
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all have these thoughts. It's our brain, just our mind
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just coming up with these thoughts and they're not always
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based in reality. So the best thing to do is
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pause and stop yourself from going down the rabbit hole.
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But if you get a negative thought, it's like saying
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I'm so stupid or I messed up again. Flip it
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to say something like I love learning something new. I'll
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make that work. Find a way to turn off the
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